Not Good

Has anyone out there wanted something so bad a didn't get it. I know that feeling. I've always thought that if I try really hard and be prepared I would do something great, something special. We'll I haven't. I haven't done anything special in my whole life. i realized that today after listening to my answering machine. i went for an interview, i thought went great, not excellent, but good. I have done a lot in my community, maybe not enough. I don't know. I just feel like I know I have all this potential and no one else can see it. Or maybe they see something I don't see, that I have no potential and they know it. I'm the one who is in denial. I think that is more the truth. I want to believe that I have something good to offer. I want to do something that my husband and son can be proud of. And I have failed. I have to come to the realization that I am just me, nothing special. I am doing what I was put on this earth to do, a 9 to 5 (thankless job). I am the robot. That is me, never a leader only a follower. Just me, nothing more than another statistic, just a number. I want to be so much more, but....I need to give up and just be who I am.